Oh, hello. I didn't see you come in here.

I want to tell you a little bit about a hero of mine. Chances are, he is not your hero.

His name is Art Gafowag, and he is a man who had his priorities straight.

A Bavarian during the late Renaissance period, the ideas he presented were so monumental, some scholars cite his deeds marked the end of the Renaissance. That is to say, he renaissanced the Renaissance, and thus drove the stake in the heart of a monolithic, cumbersome, stodgy beast.

Sort of like what happening to the New York Times.

Tonight we honor Art Gafowag (pronounced GAH-fvuh-vag) by partaking in his favored pastime: brewing.

Unfortunately, there will be little pleasing of the opposite sex, which was his other favored pastime.